Argh, I am so dang tired! I woke up this morning absolutely thrilled, because I had slept reasonably okay! I woke up at 11 am. 11 AM! If you don't know me, you have no idea how remarkable that is. I sighed in relief after briefly panicking, trying to figure out why I wasn't somewhere else (ie work) when I realized I didn't work until 2 pm. 2-10...yay.

So, I got up, took a shower, muched on some cereal, popped in a movie to munch by, and settled in for a relaxing "morning". My parents were still sleeping, so life was good. Until the phone rang.

It was the Avalon Tea Room wondering where the heck my brother Jamie was. He was almost an hour and a half late for work, and the dishes were piling up! Where was he? On his way to Wisconsin. He KNEW he was scheduled, he just decided to be stupid. So, I called his friend's cell phone, screamed at him, then handed the phone over to my dad...he was ....really unhappy about it...(to put it nicely)

You know what's really funny? I'm at work right now, after roasting beans for four hours, preparing to work behind the counter for four hours... and so I was trying to write my dad was mad, but I wanted to write a word that rhymes with dissed. This computer is censored, so it won't let me! Not even with spaces in between the letters. This is what it does: ....ed

Isn't that funny? You can write it with dashes though. p-i-s-s-e-d hehe. It won't let you write that, but it will let you write shit and bitch and damn but definately not .... (guess what that is)

Anyway! I went and saw "Love Actually" like I said I would last night. The place was packed! I thought it was the Matrix crowd in the line that curled from one end of the theater down the hallway of the other end. But no. When Love Actually was called out, the line idea was abandoned and there was a mad rush. I was reasonably lucky, and squirmed in pretty early on. I found a good seat by myself, and really really enjoyed it.

There was some rather uneccessary nudity, but other than that...it was good! I laughed a lot. Colin Firth was a sweetie again *grins* And Hugh Grant was of course hilarious...and sweet. The guy who played the guy Laura Linney really liked was really hot! But what happened with them?? Grrrr.... if you see it, you'll know what I mean.

Five more minutes before it's time for me to go back to work...what shall I do? Contract a strange virus that will demand immediate attention from a tall dark handsome stranger doctor man? I definately would not be able to work. No, no no. It's a serious disease. It's called... um....something really serious sounding. Yeah.

Well, looks like it's time for me to go to work now...*sigh* Unless I get that disease....I'll write more later. Ciao!

C'est Moi

Hey there howdy hi how are ya? Excellent! Good to hear it! Well, I'm at the coffee shop, surprise surprise. I got off about forty minutes ago, but I'm hanging out on the internet, because the movie I plan on taking myself to doesn't start for another hour. What am I going to go see? "Love Actually". I can't wait to see it! I've been waiting, because it has a lot of people I quite enjoy in it. Especially Keira Knightley.

Keira Knightley was the object of my undying envy when I first saw her in Pirates of the Caribbean. The first woman to kiss Orlando Bloom on screen... and she's so beautiful. And she's YOUNGER than me! How depressing... and she's british. I want so badly to be british. I want so badly to be Keira Knightley! I also loved her in "Bend It Like Beckham" Which I of course own. Wonderful movie.

Anyway! That movie opens today, so I'm taking myself out. I drive now, so that's a possibility. Now that Kelly is gone, it's vital that I drive...otherwise, I'd never leave the house. Since she and I were so much alike, we loved all the same things. All the same places. I never went anywhere without her... and that was a good thing. I didn't mind tagging along, because I usually wanted to go there too. Anyway! So, since she's gone, I HAVE to go by myself, or I wouldn't go at all. Why? Because everyone else sucks, that's why. I'm too unusual. And I have no friends under 30. Hmmm, how'd that happen? Oh, that's right. I'm an old lady. I gotta be what...126 by now?

So! I have 15 minutes until I plan to leave....what do I write about? Sunnie's new boyfriend?? *grins*

Paul. He's terrific. I think he could possibly be the one for her. Wouldn't that be grand? He's the only one the whole family has really been excited about. The only other one I liked was Klecker, but that's because he was my bestest buddy, so that was the reasoning behind that. I knew they had no future. They were too young! But Paul? He's perfect for her, and sometimes... I imagine their future together. I wouldn't mind having him as a brother. My mom and Paul's mom are already planning shopping trips together. Isn't that fantastic? Sometimes I think it's my MOM who's in love with Paul. *grins* Sunnie Stauff... has a nice ring to it. I hope it works out for them. They'd have nice looking children.

So where's my prince charming? Still looking... Sometimes I just feel empty... so many people have come and gone, and I feel stuck in the same place. Dreams too big and far away. But everyone tells me they're not out of reach. If all my english teachers knew I was working everyday at a coffee shop instead of going to school...they'd probably never speak to me again. They all thought I'd have my name in lights by now. Or at least write a best seller... Acting and writing. Not the most promising of careers for an overweight dreamer from White Bear Lake... I have a head full of stories waiting to be written down, but do I have the original spin that makes those stories interesting? To act in Hollywood you need the looks. To act on stage you need the voice. I don't have either. But do I have something else to set me apart? I don't know. Being on the top in White Bear theater doesn't mean you're off the bottom anywhere else... White Bear talent isn't much of a comparison.

I stress myself out sometimes... I could try and be a carbon copy...but it costs thousands to lose things (If you know what I mean) which is so dumb! And it costs money to gain other things. All this money that I don't have....grr and a half times ten! Oh, well. Well! I think I'm going to go to my movie now, and complain more later.

If anyone still reads this...I bet I love you!

Always, Moi

"Take a look, here I am. Can't you see? One simple smile from you could set me free. So if you take a look, let your heart be your guide. I'll show you love if you take a look, at the girl inside." - 'Take a look', Kirsten Dunst, "Get Over It"

Hello all! Or maybe no one reads this anymore. I guess that's perfectly okay, this entry is more for my own sanity anyway. It's been forever and a day since I've written in this thing...

I've been pricked with a twinge of guilt everytime I sign onto the internet, and every single time I sign off after not writing a single thing down in this journal. So... we'll do a quick update. Or maybe not so quick! We'll see how long my fingers feel like typing tonight.

Kelly moved to Connecticut. Sometimes I view her as my last link to sanity. And now that that link is gone... After she left, I thought of Jessi Campbell that way. She and I had sleepovers, watched every Orlando Bloom movie in existense, tore open and re-stuffed my gigantic fair Shark. (HUGE mess! Snow like styrofoam all over her entire house...one of the best days of my life)

Jessi was preparing to leave to Spain. She was down to her last couple of days, and she wanted to spend time with me. ME! Corrie...just plain me.

When Nikki was getting ready to go off to college, she had time for everybody BUT me. We talked about it in the hour she reserved just for me... but it still didn't feel right. They both left, and I missed them both. Right off the bat I sent things to Nikki to make her feel loved, wanted, and missed. I recieved nothing back. It's not like I give to recieve, I just give hoping to be appreciated...nothing.

About 2 weeks after Jessi left, I got two postcards from her in the mail. Saying how much she wishes I were there with her... and I wanted to be there with her.

Lurae and Dustin visited Nikki last week. I wasn't invited of course...didn't expect to be. But I didn't feel like I was missing much. I know how many wheels there are on that vehicle. And I don't feel like being the spare anymore.

I miss Kelly very much. Her cell phone number is still local, so I call it all the time. She is the one and only person on this planet that appreciates absolutely anything and everything about me. And she understands everything. She laughs at all my jokes, and continually tells me I'm destined for fame. I've never felt better about myself than when I'm talking to my older sister. She looks out for me. So in other words? My attorney has moved to Connecticut. When it comes to my family now, I have to fend for myself.

So yes...Kelly, Jessi, and Nikki are gone, along with my sanity. What else? Oh, yes! I still work one day a week at the tea room. I also work at Dunn Bros. Coffee shop. I just got a promotion. I'm now a barista and a roaster. Meaning I make drinks, and roast the coffee beans. Roasting is NOT EASY! But I got a dollar raise, so I best not complain.

Sunnie and I met Hanson awhile back. Got it all on video of course. Pleasantries pleasantries... Ummmm... I have a boyfriend! Just kidding. Mmm...Beier and I have had recent "discussions"...yay. He has a girlfriend that he just LOVES to talk about. No really. I'm happy for him. I enjoy my co-workers. i'm half their age, but still. They like me. We're going out together on Thursday. They can't wait til I'm 21, so they can take me to the "fun" places.

My birthday is a little over a month away...but after last year? I'm not planning on having a birthday. We'll see what happens... sometimes I just hate myself.

My obsession with Pirates of the Caribbean has not slowed down at all. I saw it...many times, and I was Jack Sparrow for Halloween. A very good Jack Sparrow I might add! No, not really. I was more of a miscellaneous pirate that sounded much more like Captain Barbosa. Oh, well. I scared the small children quite well!

I can't think of much else to update you on at the moment...but now that I've given a background, hopefully my next entries will be solo-topic focused.

Over and out, love you lots, may the sun shine like a barrel and a fire cracker....and the wha---? Sleep. Yes. Good. Au Revoir!

-- Moi