TRUTH BE TOLD. I am sick. Again. I spent the majority of the night in the bathroom. I am miserable. I'm so tired of feeling not good. Before...I know I was depressed. Depression opens the gates to illness. That was my fault. But having been in it and coming out of it before, at least I can recognize it. I only fell deeply once or twice. I didn't stay in it for weeks at a time like before.

I came online with the hopes of finding a distraction. I always love hearing from back home. That always lifts my spirits. I got to hear from my Amber, and Sunnie sent some more pictures.

My head won't stop pounding. It gets a little better every day, but I've never had a 3-day headache before. It MUST be hormonal. Birth control withdrawal? I dunno. It was prescribed for me years ago, but I have no more health insurance at the moment.

BJ said his Aunt is going to get it for me for free (female issues...too many of them.) that's one of the promises he made before I moved down here. There were a lot of those promises flying around when I would express my concerns. Apparently, I'm going to have the meds by Saturday. I explained to BJ last night that I didn't mean to harass him about it. (Because he had said he didn't want to be so pushy with his aunt) and I didn't want to push his aunt, but it's a little more than a little important. Had I known this wasn't as "taken care of" as I was lead to believe, I may have waited in moving. I put it into perspective though. It's not just my problem, (since we plan to be married) without the medication we may not be able to have children in the future. Funny problem, huh? Without birth control, I can't get pregnant. Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

I can't get rid of this headache. I can't really look at the computer screen. I tried, I failed. If there are a lot of typos, forgive me. I didnt check. Thank you to those who write to me. Takes the edge off the pain. I'm okay though. I'm afraid I won't be better until I have the meds, though. If this headache is what I think it is. And it's not just a headache...it's...well, I thought I had caught the flu from BJ last night. I felt really sick. I hope I am wrong. I think I was wrong...but I can't tell the difference right now.

Oh, it's gonna be a long week if I'm right about the meds. Good glory. Save me.

ME!